It's easy to get caught up in the performance aspect of leading worship. Worrying about how I look or sound more than drawing people into a true encounter with God. It's easy to let it go to my head. Very easy. So for a long time I avoided it. I called myself a "soloist" rather than a worship leader. I only sang "specials" in church. I would cringe if someone asked me to lead worship (being completely honest here), I was so afraid of putting on a "show" during a time where I drew closest to the Lord right in the comfort of my own seat. But God has given me freedom from this fear. He has shown me that being REAL, is being real in public, in secret, in the light and in the dark. It is so easy to worship God with great music and singing, but take that all away and we should still worship Him. Once I truly learned this in my heart, and learned to worship God in private - I was able to do it publicly. It was an overflow of what had already been going on in my relationship with the Lord throughout the week. Singing words like, "drawn to redemption by the grace in His eyes" actually mean something personal. I needed His grace in this and this and definitely this situation.

Which brings me to tonight...

We had an incredible time of worship at Watermark. One of the greatest songs I've ever heard about the reality of worship is "Clear the Stage" by Ross King. My good friend, Emily, sings this song so beautifully (she needs to record it!) and I was again reminded tonight of why I do this. It's not about the song... it's about the heart. Leading worship is only a struggle when you are struggling in worship alone. Set it all ablaze and have revival.