The "rule of three" is a writing principle that suggests that a trio of events or characters is more humorous, satisfying, or effective in execution of the story and engaging the reader. 

Well here we are. Three months with three children. I think I’m finally coming out of the fog a little bit in order to think clearly about how this transition has been for our family. I’ve been wanting to write for a couple months now - but every time I sat down to try, the words never came. And, of course, I haven’t had a lot of time to just sit there and wait for them to arrive. But I’m currently in the car driving back from a trip with my sweet family of five, and it seems like time and words have finally come together. (Translation: now that I’ve had three days of living in a hotel with two preschoolers, a newborn and sharing a double bed with my husband, I feel somewhat qualified to write this!)

What’s been good?

Let’s start off with what’s been good about having three children. First, there’s the obvious sweetness of having a baby again. The newborn smell, the soft skin, the baby coos and gurgles. Our first two were so close in age that, whenever Hannah was born, Micah was still technically a “baby” at only 18 months. It wasn’t until Hannah turned three last year that I felt the sting of no longer having a “baby” anymore. But God was gracious and I only had to miss it for two months, before I found out I was pregnant again with our sweet Chloe! The whole process of having a baby helps me slow down and remember what's truly important in life. The weight and responsibility of having someone else depend on you for their every need is a scary, yet, beautiful thing. I’ve also loved seeing Micah and Hannah in the “big sibling” role. They love being big helpers! They are always “fighting” over who gets to throw away the diaper and bring me the wipes (how did I ever change a diaper without help before?!) And when you have three - the other two can play together while you feed the baby, put the baby down for a nap, or just want to sit and snuggle. It’s pure bliss. That is, until someone starts crying. Which brings me to...

What’s been hard?

When one baby cries, it’s hard. But when you have two or three crying at the same time, you begin to assess which type of crying requires immediate attention and become somewhat numb to the rest. Sometimes I feel a little guilty that there isn't more of me to go around. I still remember one of the first nights we brought Chloe home and our second-born, Hannah, was in the other room fighting bedtime. Josh had already told her several times that it was time to go to sleep, but she wasn’t having any of it! I was consumed with back to back feedings, diaper changes and getting Chloe to sleep, that it wasn’t until I heard Hannah crying in the other room that it finally hit me - she needed me too. Before her little sister was born, I would scratch Hannah's back and sing her to sleep nearly every night. Now that I was home from the hospital, I wanted her to know I could still be there for her too. I picked Hannah up from the living room, carried her to bed and, as soon as her head hit the pillow, began to scratch her back and sing. She went right to sleep. Tears streamed down my face at the realization that while she was no longer the baby, she was still my baby. I’m not sure I was emotionally prepared for the balancing act of splitting myself three ways.

What have I learned?

On my first day alone with three kids, one of the first things I did was organize my house. Those that know me, know this is very out of character! I’m more of your spontaneous, go-with-the-flow type (and okay, sometimes that translates to messy!) But when I set my mind to something, I can do very uncharacteristic things quite convincingly. In the process of becoming a mom to three - I learned that I needed some organization to function. Or else, I would go absolutely crazy (or crazier!) Toys that used to be scattered across the house, now have a home in the bedrooms. I made a plan for our homeschool stuff. I organized the kids’ clothes. I even meal-planned! If "postpartum nesting" is a thing, I definitely have it. And truthfully, in that sense, being a mom to three has forced me to learn to become a better person all-around. 

I don’t want to sugarcoat it - this season has been difficult to the point of tears some days. But I think that's just life. Whether we're single, married with one, two or three children - life can be difficult, painful and beautiful, if we let it. When the hard moments hit, our foundation is revealed. Without a life and marriage built on Christ, I know that this home of ours would crumble. I am thankful for the Word that is planted deep in my heart to remind me to seek peace when chaos is abounding and to never let my expectations steal joy from my reality. For me, expectations can often creep in through social media and what is portrayed visually through filters and staged photos. I’m sure if it wasn't social media, it would be something else - books, television, etc. There will always be ways we can gain inspiration, that the enemy will twist to make us feel inferior. 

With all that said, having three children has helped me find my rhythm as a mom. Our first little baby boy changed our lives. We felt so blessed to become parents and enjoyed the 1-on-1 time of learning together. It wasn't long before we added our beautiful, second-born baby girl - and that season with two young babies should have been more difficult on paper, but we managed to laugh through it! Adding Chloe to our family has been such a sweet and wonderful gift - but also challenging, in the sense that it requires more of me. More attention, more planning, more initiative, and more focus. All good things. But in order to give more to my children, I’ve had to let go of some things I was holding on to for myself. My pride being one of them (and if the minivan didn't do it - the homeschooling sure will!)

As the rule of three suggests, a trio of characters are more humorous, satisfying and effective in execution of the story and engaging the reader. Here I am, the reader in the story of my children’s lives. 

Today, I turn 30. 

I have been torn for months between treating this birthday like just another day and making a bucket list of crazy and adventurous things to do before I roll over to another decade. I have to be honest, I have felt a bit more nostalgic than ever about turning thirty. I'm usually one who is SO focused on the future and looks ahead with anticipation for every new stage of life! But, right now? I just want to freeze time.

I LOVED my 20s. I married my dream guy, graduated from college (twice!), went on my first overseas mission trip, bought our first and second homes, made lifelong friends, recorded albums and started a family. How could it get any better than that?!?

I am praying for vision for my 30s. That God would guide me in how to live intentionally with the time he has so graciously given me on this earth. I definitely believe that begins by praying for faithfulness in the every day mundane. While my 20s were filled to the brim - and I was able to experience and accomplish many life goals and dreams - I want my 30s to be even more productive for the things that will matter long after I'm gone. 

I nixed the bucket list, "30 things to do before I turn 30" idea, because my twenties truly were an adventure of their own. But I had to do something to honor this last decade of my life. So I put together a momento of photos from every birthday in my twenties and under each photo you will read a short description of that day. I'll let you be the judge if I've aged any (the answer is absolutely NOT, right?!) 

20

When I woke up that very first day in my twenties - some friends in my dorm hall had covered my door in feminine product decorations. Hahaha. Nothing like starting a new decade feeling like a queen! And just a couple weeks after I turned 20, I graduated with my AA in Music. 

21

On my 21st birthday, I got wild and crazy with my younger sister (who had just graduated high school!) and we both went out and got our EARS PIERCED! Haha! It was the first time for both of us - and since I was getting MARRIED the very next month, it seemed like as good a time as any! 

22

There was no hit song by Taylor Swift when I turned 22, or I would have definitely been jamming to that all day. Instead, we spent the day in Greenville, SC visiting Josh's family and celebrated his younger brother's high school graduation and his dad's birthday as well. This was a great first birthday with my new Robinson family!

23

On my 23rd birthday, I was able to take my mother-in-love to get a pedicure with me! I believe it may have been her very first one! It was so fun. I look back on this year so very fondly. I released an EP (New Day) and made some of my closest friends while serving at a church in Alabama. 

24

My 24th birthday was celebrated surrounded by good friends! We not only went out to eat together, but most of these friends pictured came out to support me at a local X-Factor audition that morning! So kind! I ended up getting cut after making the Top 10, but with all these friends around I felt like a winner. :) 

25

The year I turned 25, was the year I became a mom. In this photo, I was about 20 weeks pregnant with my sweet little boy, Micah. We had JUST moved a few days prior for my husband's job and I was pretty sad on my birthday - missing my friends and all. But little did I know, Josh had a surprise party planned after dinner back at our new house (that was barely unpacked!) with new and old friends. That husband of mine always knows how to make me feel special!

26

My 26th birthday fell on a Wednesday night (actually fun fact: all of our birthdays, including Micah's, fell on a Wednesday that year!) and that was when Josh taught our students at church, so we waited until the weekend to celebrate. We had a great day date in The Villages eating good food and watching a movie. We felt like the youngest people there (which was secretly my goal!) 

27

My 27th birthday came only two months after my baby girl, Hannah, was born. So this was one of our first dates out in awhile! We definitely took advantage of having a sitter and spent the quality time together just the two of us. Looking back now, I can see how birthdays started to change once we had children. Haha! 

28

Spending the day at Magic Kingdom for my 28th birthday, was definitely one of my favorite ways to celebrate! After you become a parent, birthdays just become another excuse for a family fun day! I remember feeling the most blessed that I had ever felt on this day. 

29

My 29th birthday was the first time I shared my birthday with Mother's Day as a mama! It was indeed very special. After having moved back to Jacksonville just a few weeks prior, we went out with my sister and her husband to Cheesecake factory after church. Having my family surrounding me (especially these babies!) was more than I could ask for my last birthday in my 20s.

Tonight, Josh has planned to invite a few friends over to our new home to celebrate! I was challenged recently to have a new outlook on aging - instead of looking at how old I'm getting, I'm choosing to look at how long God has allowed me to continue living on Earth with people I love. If there's anything I've learned from looking back on my twenties it's that, God is my constant.  While people and places have come and gone over the years, He has remained. And when I am restless, I find my rest in Him.

Twenties, you were good.
But it's time to move on. 
Let's do this, thirty. 

I'm the kind of person who likes to be in a crowd of people, but doesn't mind sitting alone or off to the side chatting with just a few. As the internet is getting more and more crowded, I find myself drawn more and more to this little space.

In the early days of blogging (I'm talking 2008-2009, been here a long time!), you could do things like blog without a specific topic just because you felt like it. You could share photos of your kids and family, without worrying about someone stealing them. In those days, blogs were more lifestyle and less promotional. 

I want to keep blogging. And I want to keep doing it the old-fashioned way. And yet, I can't ignore the fact that social media has basically killed the blogosphere.

I miss the community that once existed in the blog world. I miss the encouragement and humor. The life updates that let you hear the stories that the photos don't always tell. There was something so honest about it. You couldn't just hide behind a pretty picture - you had to use your voice to engage. 

When I think about blogging these days, it's usually only when a certain topic is heavy on my heart. The little stuff is for Facebook or Instagram. And the even littler stuff - like those one liners that are usually not as funny as I think they are - for Twitter.

But, there is a lot of life going on behind the little snippets that we all share. There are a lot of really great moments that never get Tweeted and a lot of really sad moments that are barely ever captured in a photo. And maybe that's a good thing, because some things do deserve to be kept private. But, for the amount of time that we spend engaging online - the facade has got to be stripped back every once and awhile to let people in. Just getting "likes" on social media doesn't really mean much, anyway. I want to have conversations. 

So, here's to blogging like the old days again. And me getting my nice camera out every once and awhile to capture my babies in their favorite element. And telling the fuller stories behind the photos. 

Like this one... we spent the morning at the park the other day. Micah and Hannah had a blast! They love getting out of the house and, especially, meeting and playing with other kids. It's funny, at one point, they both wanted to ride the same horse and Micah (being the taller one) beat her to the saddle. As I was snapping away, I captured a photo of Hannah falling backwards after being bumped by the booty of the horse Micah was proudly riding! It was a photo to cherish. But probably one I wouldn't normally share on social media - just because, you never know what people will say (she was completely fine, by the way, and got up as quickly as she fell!)

But I'll share it here. Here in my little space. And who knows, I may decide to make this place my more permanent home on the internet, using social media only as a tool to promote it. Because there was a day when engaging on the internet was inspiring for me, and most of the credit goes back to those early days of blogging. 

Oh gosh, I'm starting to sound old.