I have been thinking lately about seasons. Not necessarily the meterological kind, although I am eagerly awaiting fall here in Florida (if there ever was such a thing). Seasons in Florida are a bit of a mystery, because while they tell us on paper that it’s “fall” it still very much feels like “summer” until one day you’re caught freezing outside watching your kid’s soccer game without a jacket in sight. Florida blood is thin, so next time you prepare well and bring out your cutest, comfiest sweater that you’ve been dying to wear and then end up sweating in it for 3 hours while drinking a pumpkin spice latte. The memes are very real.

Anyway, I’m not talking about those types of seasons. I’m talking about seasons in life. College, dating, marriage, parents, grandparents, retirement, etc. It’s funny how we spend so much time preparing for a career in high school but, no one actually tells you that if the Lord wills, the longest season of your entire life may be something you were completely unprepared for — parenting.

There’s a common saying that, “you could never be prepared to be a parent.” And while I get the sentiment, every child is going to be different and have a different set of needs, no one ever says that about other seasons of life. We never say, “Don’t worry about having a good work ethic now, because every job is different.” And when it comes to marriage, you’ll hear people often say, “Become the type of person you want to marry.” We are expected to spend time learning and growing for other seasons of life, but parenting? Just wing it. You can never be prepared. Good luck!

Our oldest boy turned ten last weekend and we’ve officially been in the thick of this parenting thing for a decade now. It flew by and at the same time, we’ve lived so much life! Currently, I am watching as friends and previous students of ours (my husband, Josh, was a student pastor for 14 years!) are becoming parents for the first time. It brings me back to those early days of not knowing what I was doing, ha! And while I am still very much learning and growing everyday from those ahead of me, there are a few things I’m sensing the Lord wants me to share that I’ve learned from being a parent in just this short time.

1. You will spend more time learning than teaching.

   I think we assume we will go into parenting teaching our children all the things. We may even have a long list of things on the priority list to teach them. But it humbles me to acknowledge, while I can foster and encourage a good learning environment, I can’t take credit for everything they learn. Ultimately each child is going to learn and grow at their own pace. If nothing else teaches you this… just wait until potty training. I potty-trained three children the exact same way and they all took to it a little differently! Before you can teach, you will need to learn how your child receives information. Whether it’s learning to sit up, eat with a spoon, read or write or more spiritual things, like going to church, reading their Bible and following Jesus. We can only take so much credit for what they do with the information they receive. Don’t forget to pay attention along the way, because you’ll need to study your child as you help them become good students.

2. You will sacrifice a lot.

   It’s not if you will sacrifice something when you become a parent, it’s what and how much you are willing to sacrifice. You will have to sacrifice your time and energy to put someone else’s needs first. (I remember when I got my first cold while nursing one of my babies and realizing that the show must go on! I couldn’t stop feeding my baby just because I was sick). You will have to make sacrifices in your budget and finances. (We have reached the point where all of our kids finish their own meals and one orders off the adult menu! Eating out is now a luxury.) You will have to sacrifice some hobbies you really enjoy (hence, why I rarely have time to blog anymore! Until your kids get a little older and maybe you can enjoy some of those hobbies together!) The sacrifices are all worth it though, because ultimately laying down yourself for another grows your capacity to give and love fully.

3. You may question all of your life choices.

   I would be lying if I didn’t admit that parenting can drive anyone a little crazy at times. At some point, you will question if you are doing the right thing. You will question this no matter what type of diapers you choose for your baby, the type of food you feed your family, whether you stay home or work, or the type of schooling you choose for your kids. If there’s anything I’ve learned from becoming a parent, it’s that we are all doing the best we know how to do. A good parent questions their decisions constantly, because they want the best for their child. The important thing is that we seek good advice from people we trust and walk wisely in those decisions. And as one of my good friends always encourages me, “You can always change your mind!”

There is probably so much more I could share, but I only have so much time (because I’m a parent, after all!) One of the best things I’ve learned in this season is to give grace to myself and others. No parent is a perfect parent. I’ve failed, asked forgiveness and learned to get back up and try again. The only perfect example we have is Jesus. Which ultimately brings me to the most important thing I’ve learned as a parent…

I need Jesus, more than AnythIng.

Of all the seasons in life, I feel the most sanctified in this one. While sometimes this season of parenting children can feel like the hardest thing we will ever do, I know the reality in the back of every parent’s mind is… it’s temporary. And just like seasons in Florida, it may come and go as quickly as it arrived.

Humans are fickle and make horrible idols.

This is probably not the warm, fuzzy Christmas message that people like to hear during this season. But after talking with a wise friend over the phone yesterday, I can’t shake what she said.

“When we let someone have so much power over us to the point that we worry about what they think or become insecure in our words and actions when we are around them — we have positioned them as an idol in our lives. No one, but God, deserves that kind of power!”

I know I can’t be alone here when I say, I know what it’s like to live this way. When a person becomes an idol in your life — anything they do, good or bad, has a drastic effect on you. This is dangerous because, ultimately, humans will always disappoint.

We simply weren’t created to be worshiped.

Even the “great heroes” in The Bible were very flawed and fickle individuals. Perhaps that’s why we can identify so easily with them:

We are Adam and Eve thinking we know better than God.

We are Noah walking in faith one day and drunk and naked the next.

We are Job asking God why He’s taken so much away from us.

We are David in a constant struggle between seeking after God’s heart and our own sinful desires.

We are Jonah running from God in disobedience.

We are John the Baptist with radical faith and still crippled by doubt.

We are Peter walking on water one day and denying Jesus the next.

And these are just a few examples.

Reading through the characters in the Bible makes me wonder why anyone in church ever acts like they have it together! We are all a broken mess in need of the redemptive saving of Jesus Christ. This is the best time of year to refocus our hearts and minds on what this life is all about. The why began in the Garden and the how began in a manger.

May we bow at the manger in worship to the only One truly worthy.

“That is why I tell you not to worry about everyday life—whether you have enough food and drink, or enough clothes to wear. Isn’t life more than food, and your body more than clothing? Look at the birds. They don’t plant or harvest or store food in barns, for your heavenly Father feeds them. And aren’t you far more valuable to him than they are? Can all your worries add a single moment to your life?”

— Matthew 6:25-27

My husband shared on his blog today about our family’s upcoming transition (you can read it here.)

While we are so grateful and excited for this new season of ministry in Venice, Florida — I’ll just go ahead and say it: moving is for the birds. Change is never easy. Yet, just as the Lord is gracious enough to care for the birds — who are constantly on the move and don’t know where or when their next meal will be — so He is, even more so, with us.

This has become very obvious over the last few years as He has sustained us through the ups and downs and challenges of planting a church, growing a family, sustaining a healthy marriage and homeschooling. And just in our present reality of trusting the Lord in selling our current home and buying the next one — it is during these seasons that I see God’s faithfulness in the small details (like our home being under contract after only three days on the market!) Of course, He was still faithful when our last home took 5 years to sell. Whether days or years, we give Him praise for always providing for us.

I have received a few texts and messages from sweet friends and clients asking how I am doing with this transition and what the future looks like for photography here in Jax, so I thought I would address a bit of that in this post. (Sidenote: If you’re reading this, it means you care about our family and I just want to say, THANK YOU! We do not take this for granted.)

In one sense, I am RELIEVED. Because I can finally breathe normally again. God created me to be someone who wears my emotions on my sleeves and I have been holding my breath about the possibility of moving for a few months now. But there is also a deep sadness to leave a church family that we have been with since it’s very beginning. I have been reading Paul’s long-distance letters to the churches he planted in a whole new light. And if I were to write one to our beloved Chets North family, I’m sure it would sound a bit like this:

“We always thank God for all of you and pray for you constantly. As we pray to our God and Father about you, we think of your faithful work, your loving deeds, and the enduring hope you have because of our Lord Jesus Christ. We know, dear brothers and sisters, that God loves you and has chosen you to be his own people. For when we brought you the Good News, it was not only with words but also with power, for the Holy Spirit gave you full assurance that what we said was true. And you know of our concern for you from the way we lived when we were with you.”

— Paul (1 Thessalonians 1:2-5)

For someone who grew up living in the same small town her whole entire childhood — life in the ministry, serving alongside my husband, has been quite the adventure! One thing I have learned is that stepping out on faith looks different for all of us — for some, it may mean staying put when things are hard; and for others, it may mean going when things are good. But often, it just means going when God says go.

These past few weeks (and really, months) have been some of the most emotional for Josh and I. We have spent a lot of time in prayer and counseling, desperately seeking God’s direction for our family. How do you follow God’s call on your life when you see Him working in both directions? How do you surrender to an unknown future when you are secure and confident in how He is working in the present?

These were our questions.

Following God’s call doesn’t always look like a burning bush moment (although, I’m sure most of us would really appreciate if He would speak to us the way He did Moses!) It is often found in small and faithful steps of obedience.

Eventually, these steps of obedience lead us to making tough decisions. But we are confident that God always rewards bold steps of faith. And when we are seeking God daily, we can trust that He will equip and prepare us for where we can serve Him fully, using our spiritual gifts, that will bring Him the most glory.

We only have a short time on this Earth, and then eternity comes. I’m grateful to be walking alongside a man who gets this and reminds me of the mission whenever I get distracted. And most importantly, I’m thankful for a God who knows what we need even before we do. This was His plan all along — and looking back, we can see just how He’s been preparing us for it.

That said, this transition will not only be affecting my family — but my photography business as well! I have already booked all my sessions leading up to our move, and will be taking select Jacksonville sessions in the future based on when traveling allows for it. We still have family in Jacksonville and will be planning to visit during holidays and such so, hopefully, I can still work it out to keep up with some of my families! But even if it doesn’t work out, I have a list of very talented local photographers I would love to recommend.

On a personal (and maybe a bit selfish) note, I am very much excited about moving to the west coast of Florida — where the ocean is a bit bluer, the sand a bit whiter and the sun sets on the beach! Just praying I find my place and make connections in the photography world over there. (If you’re a local photographer in the Sarasota County area, please message me!)

We are very excited about becoming involved with The Bridge Church and the work God is already doing in the community there! Thanks to those of you who have prayed and walked alongside us in our ministry journey. We count it a blessing to have crossed paths with so many of you over the years. And while Paul’s churches only had letters — aren’t you grateful that thanks to social media, you’ll still get a constant stream of pictures of my babies? Just know that I expect the same in return. ;)